After All I Have Done for Her, Still; She Cheated On Me…
How many times have you told your friends this exact words, or is it even a topic of discussion among your folks? Perhaps you have before told your friends that your girlfriend or partner is cheating. Maybe that came up when they ask about your girlfriend and you say: I broke up with her because she cheated on me”
Before now, when you think of your relationship, what comes to mind is a pleasant atmosphere. Things are working fine for you both, no hassle, you’ve had dreams – you’ve practically lost counts on the number of times you’ve dreamt of a “happy ever after.”
But suddenly, things start to change. Your girlfriend that has stuck with you begins to detach herself from you; you wonder what could be wrong – a lot could be. But this isn’t what you’ve dreamt off. And you start asking questions like; is she cheating on me?
And finally, in your sleep, the thought kept racing, you’d have thought it’s just a dream, but waking up to see the reality smashing on you, you audibly asked in amazement, “she cheated on me?” No that couldn’t be you said -as if you could turn back the hands of time, regrettably, it has happened; the reality is right before you!
Let’s face it, the thought of a cheating girlfriend isn’t a lovely memory to remember, and surprisingly. Many often times, you ask yourself, why did she cheated on me? You aren’t the only one that is battling with this horrible phase – many like you are depressed about this. Seeking a comfort zone is expected. After all, when faced with trauma, we want solutions. I am sure that’s what you find.
Firstly, I’ll commend your decision to get over this severe condition. It shows you are master over your feelings, you want to get back on track, and most notably, you want seasoned experts to take you by hands and lead you safely! Honestly, highlighting here tells me that all you needed to know is what steps to take regarding your cheating girlfriend. That’s fine, but do you know that there are underlying issues that you should keenly have interest in prior taking the ultimate step – what you can do to a cheating girlfriend.
Take, for example, you should know why some girlfriends cheat, and if at all you’ve not been to that stage, however, you have skepticism, doubts that your girlfriend is cheating, the next subheading delivers exclusively signs your girlfriend is cheating on you.
Well, the principles and points you will find in this article are primarily channeled to boyfriends whose girlfriends have cheated on. Nevertheless, everyone can benefit from the points. Those points will have a radiant light shine on some aspect of the relationship that some folks have been handling quite wrongly.
Now, let’s take a trip down to the first subheading, which answers the question, why do we have cheating girlfriends?
Why do we Have Cheating Girlfriends?
Generally, it is often believed that men are scum bag – they are known for cheating! This puts women on the positive side; they claim or view them as being faithful. But consider this: When men cheat, who do they go out with? Or they go only with single ladies?
The fundamental truth is that both men and women cheat. Men say: “she cheated on me.” Also women say: “He cheated on me”. So, it’s never a one-sided situation, and it cuts across all genders. Why exactly do women cheat in a relationship? I’ve compiled globally recognized reasons that will answer your question of “why did she cheated on me?” I’ll be revealing the first five of the leading reasons why you can have a cheating girlfriend – be sure that I don’t entertain or exonerate any of the reasons. However, for the lesson’s sake, I’ll be revealing them to you.
- They Feel Neglected, Undervalued, or Ignored. Toss these actions to your girlfriend; you are indirectly dragging them down to a level they least imagined. In a short while, they view themselves as maids, housekeepers or nanny that she mainly must care for the household – and in most cases, they are rarely valued. To gain comfort, your girlfriend turns out to an external factor -knowingly or unknowingly transforming themselves to a cheating girlfriend, they want to validate their status, and they want to know who they are.
- Cravings for Intimacy. Unfortunately, most men reasoned that sex would keep a relationship. Even though sex plays a significant role in a relationship, it isn’t the only need for a relationship to thrive, and that mistaken understanding wrecks disaster on the relationship.Most girlfriends have craving beyond the scope of sex; they crave for emotional interplay. A long talk, a fun filled time, thoughtful speech, exemplary social life – and so much more! If these needs aren’t met, they humbly walk away making you say: “she cheated on me.”
- Loneliness. Loneliness, being one of the signs your girlfriend is cheating might seem stale, but the fact is, it does count! Your girlfriend can feel loneliness for several reasons. Some could be due to a distant relationship, little or no time for social activities, or even emotional absence. Just name them, whatever makes your girlfriend feels distant from would make her feel lonely. And in this kind of situation, only a few can endure, the majority, will, without delay acquire connection via infidelity to bridge the existing gap.
- Unreachable High Expectations. Unreasonable expectations can make your girlfriend cheats. Some girlfriend would demand your attention every time, every day. Little did they realize that being in a relationship doesn’t suggest giving a girl all the time (of course you need some private time for yourself)When they don’t get that, out of their selfish interest, they will seek attention somewhere – definitely, with time, the care they found elsewhere becomes to them like a wishful dream, probably after several attempts, they’d learn they have unrealistic expectations and desires.
- Be All Things to Everyone. Yes, being industrious is healthy; it is a trait that can keep a girlfriend in a relationship. This trait is so valuable that even when a girl walks away ( probably because her boyfriend cheats), the boyfriend will want her back. The error most girlfriends make is trying to satisfy everyone. They want to merge the love they have for their boyfriend with male friends, workers, and many others. And in a bit to please everybody, they fall into the prey of cheating on their boyfriend.
With these five points, you may desire to know where it started from, that is, “is my girlfriend cheating on me?” The signs below are valid signs you shouldn’t keep your sight off.
Read more on why people cheats in relationships here
Signs Your Girlfriend is Cheating on You
Ideally, it is not healthy to start suspecting either your boyfriend or girlfriend acting as a night hunter, seeking for ways to validate if they are cheating. If this stage is launched, it is evident that trust starts walking off the relationship.
Notwithstanding, what can you do in extreme cases where you have begun nurturing some ill feelings about your girlfriend’s actions? It will be wrong to conclude that she’s cheating on you. Hence, to be sure that your intuitions are correct, then you have to travel the road of these telltale signs. Over the years, they’ve been a revealer of secrets.
- No Interest in Future Plan Discussions. Let me ask you, what should be the goal of a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship? Marriage? Correct, but is your girlfriend willing for such discussion? Is there any couple of goals you’ve presented on the table, and it’s being tossed away? You see, living together, marrying and building a life together should be the plan of a girlfriend and boyfriend relationship, but if your girlfriend is shying away from these discussions, it is a sign that she’s cheating on you.
- Manipulation and Blame Game. There is no denying that both boyfriend and girlfriend would err in some instances; it can’t always be from one of them. But does the situation rings similarities in your relationship? Does she come up with signs that reveal that she isn’t happy with the relationship regardless of how much effort is disbursed? Manipulating and immersing you with guilt is her way of telling you “I am sick of this relationship, I am with someone else, yes, I am cheating on you!”
- They are flirting Right in Your Presence. Flirting should strongly be frowned at in a relationship. Some girlfriends who still desire moments with their boyfriends for best reasons known to them might fear to flirt in the presence of their boyfriend. However, if any girlfriend could expand her circle, transitioning her hidden flirting to a public flirting, worst of it all, in the presence of her boyfriend, there is no other way to define their message than, telling their boyfriend that they don’t value them, all interests have drowned, and your feelings aren’t considered.
- She Gives Brief And Short Text Messages. Ask anyone who you know his girlfriend cheated on recently, one of the reasons they say: “I broke up with my girlfriend” could be traced down to the genesis of the matter, short text messages. Their girlfriend that deeply appreciates long texts, or probably wouldn’t want a break in your text, is now “miss brief,” and “zero spice.” She has nailed the heart-heart conversation! This is a sign that you are in for a long ride.
- She Socializes Without You. I wouldn’t want to see you as being over possessive. If you are, then you are the one digging the grave of your relationship, no doubt. But how would you describe your girlfriend? Would you say: “my girlfriend takes me as her last priority and deeply crave for more enjoyable moments with friends and not you even when you are always ready to sky high the relationship? Does she go to the club without your consent, and instead of having a good party with you, she gives it to someone else? That is a warning sign that she’s out of the relationship, and in due time, you will say: “She cheated on me.”
- If She Comes to You For Money Always. The desire to get money could make a less interested girlfriend in a relationship rains on you sweet words and countless sob tales. The problem isn’t her request, but weigh this: When you compare the number of times she’s met you about the journey of the relationship and the number of times she’s met you for money, which one takes the larger share, the request for money? Then, you might be in for a long ride! She’s getting your money to fulfill her fantasies, her needs and not the relationship needs. If you need to spend on your girlfriend, be minimal and reasonable.
- She Often Lies About Her Whereabouts. An honest girlfriend is an asset for a relationship, no doubt. However, when your girlfriend is tired and sick of the relationship, they lie often about where they visit. She tells you she’s heading there, you find her in another location. If a girlfriend is for a future trip in a relationship, they need not lie about their whereabouts. Even when where they visited isn’t a place of interest to you, they will still tell you.
- She Gets Into What You Hate. Granted, there would have been situations where you tell your girlfriends things you detest. It could be what she wears, where she visits, her friends and lots more. At a point, she listens, and you commend her, but unfortunately, she picks up the old personality and gives them optimum concern without considering your feelings. There is no soothe saying that she’s seeing someone else!
With these points succinctly discussed, if your girlfriend is cheating on you, you can provide an answer to why did she cheat. Now you aren’t left in the lurch regarding your girlfriend status. Undoubtedly, if you’ve ever asked: “is my girlfriend cheating on me?” this section has provided a comprehensive list and what you should be on the lookout for.
Having gained fundamental insight into these two aspects. You may have seen what you’ve done wrong, and you have seen what your girlfriend has done wrong too. However, you need to know what you must do. Let’s explain explicitly what you can do about a cheating girlfriend.
What You Should do to a Cheating Girlfriend
I will reiterate this point: there is no legitimate excuse for cheating on either a boyfriend or a girlfriend. And cheating – regardless of how it is being defined, it isn’t a wise step to take! If you are in this phase, you could desire to know: “how do I get over?” In a bit to solve the problem, many resort to taking steps that aren’t intelligent enough, the aftermath of such decision is filled with regret lots of sad consequences.
You’d not expect that I will advise you to try and mend a broken relationship where your girlfriend is presenting her self to another man, putting little concern on the sacrifices you are putting into the relationship. If you are seeking for a way mend it, please this isn’t for you. But if you do, you’d still end up crying foul “she cheated on me”
This section is for realistic folks, that are aware of what is best for them and want to get back, and want to things the right way. Do you have a change of mind? Then, let’s both examine these steps that you can take and will help you find the answer to your quest: “how do I get over my cheating girlfriend?”
- Validate Your Suspicions. You can’t jump into the conclusion that your girlfriend is cheating on you without valid reasons or laying your hands on concrete evidence. Thus, it will be excellent to use the points discussed above about signs that your sayings “She Cheated on Me” is correct. Try and check if any of them is being used on you. But don’t be sluggish about your steps. Be frank and admit that these steps mean your life, yes, you read well; it does mean your life. The earlier you begin to take note of the signs, the better for you.
However, to help you confirm your intuition, it is imperative that you head on to some confrontation. That is, ask questions that are hard, her responses to such questions will further convince whether you are on the right track or you are just far from the truth. The success of your confirmation begins at this stage.
Quick Action: Notice all these eight signs discussed earlier, does she reflect any of them? Then note them. In addition to that, ask her questions like: “Where is our relationship heading?” why did you ignore some of the important topics I’ve brought up lately?” If her answers to these questions come harsh and brutal, monitor her further and validate your claim. Moreover, if you are smart enough about this, you might find out that she’ll open up to you if she sees that she can’t keep it secret any longer.
- Breakup And Be Determined. After confirming that she’s cheating on you. You have no reasons to delay your decisions. Don’t be clouded by the feeling that you’ve been together, folks have seen you both, and several other irrelevant thoughts. Every guy deserves a loyal girlfriend. You should have a girlfriend you will be proud to say, “my girlfriend is honest and straightforward and not “I don’t know whether my girlfriend is willing to stay with me forever.Start distancing yourself from him. If you are indecisive, you will get nowhere. So, start creating distance, and it should be fast! This step is to promote good mental health. Well, you are to define the type of space you’d need, nobody will, just be sure that you are comfortable with the space you are creating.Quick Action: Start by talking to her about your move, be frank about it. Limit the number of times you call her, move with genuine friends and communicate your feelings with a trusted friend.
- Visit a Hospital. If you’ve been having sex with your girlfriend and she gets out and have sex with someone else, you might be at a very high risk. Visit the hospital and examine yourself for various sexually transmitted diseases. However, if you are running no sex before marriage relationship, your visit to the hospital might be to seek help to assist you in learning practical steps to take to cope with your emotional feelings quickly.At this stage, it might be hard for you to cope; you might find it hard to sleep. Repeatedly, you might keep asking yourself: “she Cheated on me?” To get back right on track, do not delay seeking help from medical practitioners. You’d not need to be placed on drugs, preferably, you will be advised to make lifestyle changes. Those who will attend to you would kindly visit you. All the unpleasant result of a cheating girlfriend can be dealt with. You can regain your peace of mind – that which you’ve gained over a long period.Quick Action. Be smart about visiting the hospital, speak out all that you feel, apply the professional help you are being offered. And pour out your feelings completely.
- Don’t Blame Yourself. Probably, you’ve started blaming yourself, thinking, “I’d have done this, I’d have done that.” Indeed, there might be things that you’d have done rightly. Nevertheless, the blame isn’t yours. You can practically blame yourself if often she’s called you to readjust an attitude that isn’t unhealthy that you are leading and you turned a deaf ear. In fact, you’d not have turned here had it been you are at fault.Choices are only being made for dead and unconscious individuals. This simple truth would help you realize that she’s to bear the burden of her decision and not you. Furthermore, the sooner you agree, the earlier you start to see the need for you to opt into another healthy relationship. There is no gainsaying that you deserve the best relationship, and you can start working it out now. You deserve to be free from saying “she cheated on me.”Quick Action: As long as you’ve not cheated on her, don’t blame yourself. Admit that she isn’t meant to stay, if she were, she’d have stayed. Sadly, she didn’t. So, move on and learn from what happened and see how it could be applied in the subsequent relationship. Learn to get over your ex
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