How to Speak Your Mind in a Relationship

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There has been this age-long quote, “silence is golden.” The most implied instance of its wide usage mean that, remaining silent is a better alternative to speaking out one’s mind and expressing emotional grief. While it is a good thing to choose not to speak in some instances, silence isn’t always golden. It’s better you speak your mind in a relationship.

speak your mind in a relationship

In relationships, a  lot of people get seated in the background and withdraw from speaking their mind, when upset, they resort into silence, if any opinion demands for disagreement, they often give in without speaking out. Those who found themselves in this realm will do themselves more harm than good, and in the long-run breaking up will come as the last resort.


Speaking ones mind does not mean you have to speak harshly, disrespectfully and without cautious. So while you want to learn how to speak your mind in a relationship it is also imperative to understand reasons you should always speak your mind in a relationship. The two preceding sub-headings will highlight those points.



Five Practical Ways to Speak Your Mind in a Relationship

As previously explained, I will first discuss practical ways to adopt if you have problems speaking your mind in a relationship, afterward, I will discuss reasons you should speak your mind in a relationship.


  1. Start Small And Simple: Shyness could be attributed to what’s withholding you from speaking your mind. Should you blurt out or explode so that your spouse feels your pain loudly? No! Start small by saying “oh darling, there is something I’d love to discuss with you.” That simple start will drive off fear and prepare you ahead of the conversation.

speak your mind in a relationship

  1. Think Well Before You Speak: You can be disappointed if you speak and are not favorably heard. What could be accounted for that? It may have been because you did not think so well before you spoke. Imbibe the habit of thinking if your speech will be considerate enough and practice using respectful words. Thinking before you speak maintains respect and create an avenue to be more favored when you speak.


  1. Remain Calm: Ask yourself, who are you speaking to? It is evident that you are not conversing with a stranger neither are you discussing with an enemy. You are discussing with a friend and a lover. For that reason, do not be gripped with the attitude of raising your voice. If you are speaking your mind, you will do that naturally.

Reasons Long Distance Relationship Fails

  1. Ask For Your Partner’s Opinion: Yes, It is very unlikely that your spouse will hate speaking ones mind, after all, your spouse speaks their mind when hurt as well. Asking after their opinion about “speaking your mind in a relationship” is not a far cry to attaining the attitude of speaking your mind. It relaxes you the more, and build you on the premise that they love to hear from you.


  1. Speak Your Mind in Writing: If you still find the above point unattainable which I doubt. Writing can bring a lot of relief. In fact, it afford you the opportunity to think well. Written words are powerful, thus never underestimate the extent at which it will go in reaching your partner’s heart. A short message about a matter to be discussed can feel the space and get you both talking about it. Although, this should not always be your “truck stop,” just use it as a basis, and with time you wont have to write before you speak your mind in a relationship.


Having seen how you can speak your mind in a relationship, it is best we learn reason you should always do that. Here below are 7 reasons you should always do speak your mind in a relationship.


7 Reasons You Should Speak Your Mind in a Relationship


The primary target of this article is for those in a relationship, however, those planning a romance or in a secular work can learn from the principles that will be highlighted.


  1. Your Spouse Will Respect You

When you speak your mind, you earn your spouse’s respect. They know your standpoint about something. They will not bother about you feel about a subject; because they already know. If it is something they know will upset you, they will better not try it.


  1. It relieves Stress

If you do not speak your mind, you are certainly carrying around a considerable amount of anxiety which damages your well-being. You constantly stab your self with the thought, letting go of the thought becomes a burden and so on. But when you do, you accomplish throwing it off and henceforth enjoy tranquility.


  1. It is the Right Thing

A good book says “…. a time to speak.” There must be a time to speak. There are ample reasons to do that, it keeps you off track of an unhealthy relationship.


  1. Your Spouse is not a Mind Reader

It is healthy when couple are concerned about their spouses countenance. But using that to draw conclusions is doing otherwise. Your spouse can only ask you “what the matter was” and not, “I know how you feel.” Even if they do say that, it is based on pretense. So learn to speak as they will be aware of your concern and needs.


  1. You Teach Others

You would think people are off the scene. But actually they are not. They necessarily do not need to be there when you speak your mind respectfully, but your little chat with friends and relatives will sure reveal how well your sternly example should be imitated.

speak your mind in a relationship

  1. It Build healthy Communication

The bedrock of “speaking ones mind in a relationship” is communication. If you shy away from speaking your mind, you are indirectly moving far from developing a healthy communication.


See 5 Communication Mistakes Couples Make

  1. You Refrain Yourself From Regrets

You would have heard sentiments like “Had I know, I would have spoken out,” “How I wish I had revealed my intentions.” These phrases are built on regrets- results of previous actions. To save yourself from these regrets, speaking out your mind in a relationship is the answer.

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